Finding God in Heartbreak

My heart is heavy with hurt for the people in CT today. There are so many things that don't make sense to me in this world. Right now, as I sit here and cradle my stomach and the little boy that lies inside it, I cannot imagine him growing up and being so broken and having so much hatred and hurt in his heart. I ache for what  that man must have been going through. I ache for the grief of twenty seven families. These people lost sons, daughters, husbands, wives, and siblings. I ache for the children of that school that were forced to watch or listen as their classmates, friends, and teachers were brutally taken from them. In these moments, I find myself growing angry at God. I ask Him how this happened, how we could have prevented it, why He didn't stop it. I grow so frustrated with His timing because my heart breaks for these people. But I have to remember that He didn't cause this. And He never left those victims, not for one second. He was there, right in the middle of their suffering and pain. He held them close to Him as Satan attempted to use a lost, broken man to wage a worldy war against our High Father. But Satan didn't win. Because God was there. "It is the Lord who goes before you; He will not leave you of forsake you..." Deuteronomy 31:8. He stayed inside the school this morning, and He refused to let Satan have even one of those victims. So I can take comfort in that. Daddy God, our Yahweh, I pray that you lift up the families of those twenty six dead, and remind them that you have not left. You have not forsaken them. I pray that You put it in their hearts to seek You when their grief becomes unbearable in the days to come. I ask that You wrap Your arms around that community as each person has a different battle to face in overcoming this. Papa, I beg that You put it in the hearts of those affected to lift this man up to You and forgive Him. He was broken. He was lost. He was living in Sin. And he does not deserve their forgiveness. But neither did we, Papa, and I pray that You help these families do the impossible and give it over to You. I know that Your plan is great. I know that You are good. I know that not everything in this world is going to make sense. And I just ask for Your comfort in those senseless times.